Wondering aloud

I often go for a walk in the center of my city. With music in my ears and eyes wide open for details. It is when I do a lot of my thinking. It usually follows the music as well. And I walk and walk until some kind of resolution comes to my head. A kind of cheap psychoanalysis. It is often followed by shopping, always works. ๐Ÿ˜› No, really I take that seriously. I like to ask myself what is right and what is wrong. If I am a good person or a bad one. If I am too “little” or too “much” for each occasion. How my worth is valued. What people see in me. What do I change, what do I enhance. The answer is all and nothing. I can be everything. I can be bad and I can be good. I can be pretty and I can be ugly. I can be smart and funny and I can be boring. I am not a thing that can be measured. I change constantly. I change from the inside, from the outside, other people’s perception changes. I also have my mood swings, my good days and my bad ones, the moments that everything is in place and those others that all is falling apart. I am, like all of us, a human. A human who is fighting everyday small battles against myself and the world. That is what makes me alive and gives me purpose. And that purpose is what makes you creative. That is what life is all about. Creation. And that is why, despite all of this, I can be happy.

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